Hello and happy Friday!
Let’s get down to it.
A couple of months ago, I was running around with my students, doing relay races full of vocabulary and fun. It was the beginning of what was going to be very hot spring days. As I love to be a big kid, I decided to take the class outside and enjoy it. We have done so many times after this.
But on that day, as I was running with them, I fell. It was between big bush like, big weed like type of plants. All you can see is them and me running with the kids around. And all of sudden, down (the rabbit hole) I went. Seriously, there was a big hole in between and landed on the ground. At that moment, I was close to crying but quickly shook it off and carried on.
My students helped pick up our things as we headed back. Throughout the rest of the hours, I continued like nothing. But as soon as night struck, my foot was hurting much more than I realized. I knew I had twisted it and it was a bit swollen. Of course, I did what I had to do and put ice, lotion and more.
Now, let me take you a couple of years back. I saved this old lady once, as she was about to cross the street with running cars right in front of us, I pulled her back and fell on the ground with it. Not remembering much more than that, I did wake up with a headache and a sprained wrist. Once again, I did what I had to do and took care of myself. It was my writing hand too and I made sure it had a full recovery.
Lastly, a few other years back, I did a lot of sport leading to some injuries. Either back, head or legs of course. All these times, apart from saying that I am clumsy and determined to get something right, I can say that I didn’t really shout in pain or tell anyone much of the pain.
This thought came by me as I discovered more of myself. The fact that I had always felt like a leftover and like I didn’t count, I didn’t make a big hassle of every time I fell. When some of my friends recall these moments, one of the main thing they tell me is “I thought it didn’t hurt that much.” Of course, I didn’t tell them straight out how much it actually hurt. I have always taken care of myself and with that, didn’t want anyone else to take of me.
I also realized that within the years, as soon as I had serious relationships, I had let go a bit of the fear of being taken care of and being vulnerable. With my previous serious one, we had a few hospital encounters too. As I was sick and had to visit the hospital area a lot, either through emergency or check-up. It lead me to open up and know it is ok to be hurt.
That is my story of all this, that a couple of months ago when I slipped and fell, I didn’t complain much. I am not that type of person. But I did tell people how much it hurt so they can be there for me, if they wanted to. And to that point, all the times that I have fallen into anything and was ashamed of it… Ashamed of it, I am no more. It is ok to be hurt. It is ok to have a few scrapes here and there. And not only that, it is more than ok to have people help you, to have people take care of you, to have people give you a helping hand.
You just have to open up, be sincere with yourself and know that there are people who do want to help. I have learnt it in my later years and now that I am here, I am happy to say that I feel loved. And even though I will still be clumsy, I won’t harm myself on purpose anymore. So if by any means I get hurt again, I know to be sincere on how I feel so people can help.
After all, we all deserve to be helped and most of all, loved.
Let this help remind you that it is ok to ask for help in times of need.
Have a great one,
The Always Believer
PS: had to add cute kid pictures, haven’t done that in a while and it seemed like a good opportunity. (all from google and their respective webpages)
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